I Stand Corrected

Before I actually showed up at Progress Place I thought the whole thing would just be a joke. I mean, how can washing dishes and mopping floors help me with my diagnosis? In spite of myself I decided to give it a try, and after almost a full week of attendance I can honestly say that it is a tremendous help. The duties at Progress Place are just as varied as the clients; some are very simple, some are much more involved. I decided early on that I was going to float around the more "simpler" tasks for the first little while, so lately I've been going home at five exhausted with no interest in eating; I just want to crash and watch TV. I have also found that, by being busy every day of the week, my weekends actually FEEL like weekends. This past weekend my friend Alex and I went clubbing... or at least to a club called "Footworks". We had a blast and I hope that Alex continues to want to hang out - he's one of the few sensible people that I know. I was awakened last night to musical sounds of my neighbor getting busy with one of his "girlfriends". Stuff like that really doesn't bother me because I know there will come a day when I will be doing the exact same thing without much regard for anyone else as well. I've been applying for jobs that look interesting, but I think that my "Googleness" is working against me. You can readily see both my blog and my alliances with various bipolar groups in the city, so I'm figuring they're looking me up and deciding that I am far too crazy for them to touch. My pdoc says I should be sticking to the volunteer sector right now, to build up some self confidence and gain some good references for when I am ready to go back to work. My mood has been kind of up and down, but not enough that I'm really worried about it - my visit to the specialist went well. Dr. Young seems to think that adding another mood stabilizer to my regimen might benefit me by making my mood even more stable than it is right now....I'm not really sure how my pdoc figures out exactly how up or down meets in the middle, but hey, he's the doctor. So for now my life is in the most hated stage of "hurry up and wait". My pdoc wants me to wait it out to see what is going to happen with the meds switch before I make any major commitments like returning to work or going back to school, so I have to communicate that to the nice lady at CPP. It's going to take at least three months to see any obvious differences in my mood due to the new addition, so I'm on hold until then. Yippee.