Acadian Bipolar Guy: Poetry Time

Deep Inside

Deep inside there is a man who likes to haunt me
Deep inside there is a ripping at my soul
Deep inside I fight against the devil
Wondering when I'll finally lose control
Deep inside I need to numb the feeling
The fear that turns my mind so bold
Deep inside I need to pull it all together
Someday sanity will take hold
I scream at the world deep inside
I grieve my own death deep inside
Still I wonder, yes I wonder
If the veil of fear I live under
Is something that comes from deep inside
How many people living would much rather be dead
How many hear the monster underneath the bed
How many watch the man beside them
Out of the corner of their eye
How many feel life is only real
With the fear down deep inside
I scream at the world deep inside
I grieve my own death deep inside
There is no need to wonder
The future is plain to see
The fear that I am running from
Is the man that I call "me,"
Deep inside.
-- by Darren Surette

Abilify Approved For Use In Treating Bipolar 1

February 17, 2011, Princeton, NJ- Bristol-Myers Squibb Co. and Otsuka Pharmaceutical Co. announced the U.S. Food and Drug Administration has approved the newer generation antipsychotic Abilify (aripiprazole) as an add-on treatment to the mood stabilizers lithium or valproate for the maintenance treatment of bipolar 1.
Abilify was previously approved as an add-on for the acute treatment of manic or mixed episodes associated with bipolar 1 disorder. It is also approved as a stand-alone therapy for both acute and maintenance treatment for bipolar 1.
-BP Canada

Did I Say That?

I'm still kind of afraid of what people might think of me should they find out my secret via my new blog. Part of its' purpose is to help me deal with being myself - which unfortunately also leads to me exposing myself. I'm trying to understand why different is so bad. Just because my moods are different than yours should not make either of us outcasts. People need to accept that "normal", that happy place of mediocrity and safety just doesn't exist. Maybe in the past, but not anymore. Get over it. I'm trying to.

Gotta Get Groceries?

STAY OUT OF THE CORNER STORES!!!! That's exactly what I'm screaming to myself as I walk in and out of my local corner store. The goods are sooo expensive, but teasingly easy to get. In and out is what attracts me, and I don't have to talk to anyone to any great extent. It's so temtping, but so draining on the wallet to let them suck the money right out of you.

Best Deal this Week:

Food Basics:

Maple Leaf Ham: $1.99 lb
Nestle Parlour Ice Cream: $1.88
McCain Rising Crust Pizza: $3.98
Maple Lodge Hot Dogs: $1.54

Maybe not the most nutritious picks, but when you're trying to stretch a small amount over a long period of time, every little bit helps.

Downtown Toronto YMCA

I'm not sure what the going rate is right now, but I do know the Downtown YMCA offers discounted memberships to those who can prove they have a low income as a result of a medical disability. There could be other arrangements but this is the only one that I know of based on personal experience. The Y is suited for people with mobility issues as well. It can get pretty busy and is ususally less crowded during mid-day. The facilities are like new and always impeccably clean. Call the Y to check out your possibilities - exercise (particularly weight training) is especially good for people with mood disorders, but beneficial for anyone wanting to spruce up for spring or get into a year-round routine.

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December 22, 2011

Poetry Time

Deep Inside

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